Note: I wrote this post before leaving for my trip but never had the chance to post it.
This weekend I went home, to spend some time with my parents and some friends before my trip. To get to the airport, I took the most convenient commute I’ve ever had in any of the 4 cities I’ve lived, walking just two blocks to get onto train for a 25-minute commute to the airport. The train seems to never be crowded and always feels like it has just been cleaned—in fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if they mopped the floors and picked up any trash left on the train every evening and once again during the day. The ride is smooth and very conducive to reading, and upon boarding the train settled into a seat in a semi-empty area, opened up a book and settled in for the ride.
At the next stop 4 people got on the train – a middle-aged stewardess, a retired fire-fighter (I can only assume based on the fact that he didn’t appear to be working, and seemed to be a bit older, but was wearing a Minneapolis fire department baseball hat) with a bicycle, an elderly man with a black gym bag, and an elderly grey-haired slow-moving woman with a walker. She was so slow-moving in fact, that she hardly had time to get to her seat before the train lurched to a start again, throwing her backwards into a seat with a cry of surprise. Seated next to the stewardess, she not so secretly stared at the stewardess. The stewardess, in the meantime, kept her head down, seemingly engrossed in checking her email on her smartphone but I imagine feeling the weight of the elderly woman’s stare until …
“So, are you a flight stewardess,” the elderly woman asked. “I am” came the stewardess’ curt reply. “That’s great, I wanted to be a stewardess once, you know, when I was 23,” the elderly woman continued. “I remember the interview process like it was yesterday…” and proceeded to give a synopsis of her life story. Her prior job at a 9-5 job, the question during her stewardess interview that crystalized the realities of that career when she knew she wasn’t going to get the job (“Does being a stewardess excite you because you want to explore other cities, or because you want to be on an airplane all the time?”), her subsequent dismay in not taking that path in her life but realization that it was just one of many exciting paths and how her career played out through the rest of her life to current day. The whole conversation took place over 15 minutes, with the elderly woman driving most of conversation earlier on, but overtime the stewardess warmed up so that by the end of the discussion when the elderly woman reached her stop and left the train they were chatting it up like old long-lost friends.
Immediately, the retired firefighter came up, wheeling his bike as his stop was coming up shortly, and commented (with humor in his tone) to the stewardess, “Boy, it sure can be annoying when people come up to you and start telling their life story and won’t shut up.” He added to drive the point home, “I mean, sometimes I want to be like, shut up already.” Figuring he was done, I turned back to my book, but not 5 seconds later, he continues on, asking her where she is flying today, telling her what he has planned for the day, and intermittently coming back to “I just can’t believe how that elderly woman would not stop talking to you.” I was silently laughing to myself in my seat, but I’m afraid he didn’t see the irony. As the retired fire-fighter got to his stop, the elderly man, who had until now been silent, called out to him “I hope your home is like a slice of heaven.” Turning to the stewardess, he continued “ I don’t think he heard me. How about you, is your home like a slice of heaven? Do you pray every day when you wake up that you’ll be kept safe on your flight?” And another discussion began.
Four strangers on a train, who had never met, and probably never will again. They all came onto the train from their separate walks of life and were briefly connected through discussion and got to know each other even if only for a little bit. I admit, I’m not one for speaking to random people on the train, and when others try to talk to me I bury my nose into a book, pick up a phone, or sometimes quite obviously grab my things and move to the other side of the train. In fact, at first I thought the whole situation, of these four strangers just talking with each other, was a bit crazy. Yet at the same time, the interaction was so interesting. They were all so different. Yet ready and open to meeting and speaking with each other. Even the stewardess, who I felt like I could most directly relate to, commented to the retired firefighter “Sometimes we get stuck in our phones and shut out the world around us, but it is always nicer to talk to someone else.”
And I could only help but think, next month I will be that person, taking the world on my own and looking to connect with others. I just hope that when I do, there isn’t someone with their nose in a book secretly thinking I’m crazy.
Lessons Learned
- You don’t have to be similar to someone else to be able to connect with them and have an enjoyable conversation
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